They Were Right

They were right when they said it was going to be hard. You know what I mean, right? Everyone talks about how hard it is becoming a parent. They really harp on it and you feel like you have to protect that magic.

You know us, though. By us, I mean us first time parents with some kind of complex that makes us think that we’re going to be different, we’re going to prove them wrong. Why are we like this?

Guess what. They were right. It‘s sleepless nights. It’s screaming from your child when you’ve done everything you know to do (i.e. fed them, changed their diaper, gave them Tylenol…) so you’re crying with them. It‘s fearing something new everyday that could take them away or take you away and you didn’t think you could worry more than you already did, but here you are. It’s looking at yourself in the mirror and not really knowing who you are anymore and starting to forget who you were before, not even in a physical way but in a mental way, too. It’s trying to navigate your marriage now that you’re both really, essentially new people and you’re trying to understand the other person and learn together and leaning heavily on each other even when it gets really hard, and trust me it gets really hard. It’s realizing that they were right about it being hard and how you better be ready when you do it because of how hard it is. It’s a lot of things and a lot of hard, because they said it would be.

But it’s also realizing that they were wrong. It’s realizing that you have always been a night owl, so just embrace those late night moments that are filled with snuggles and feedings. It’s moments when you figure out that all baby needed was to take this nap on you and that laundry can wait until later. It’s looking at yourself in the mirror and feeling...powerful because your body did something incredible and that’s really cool and makes the stretch marks and extra skin pretty freaking worth it. It’s looking at your husband as he embraces his new role and realizing that you didn’t think you could love him more than you already do, but your heart grows more and more every single day with love for him. It’s watching your baby learn to pull up, sit up, feed herself, hearing her giggle and recognize you and get excited when you walk in the room. It’s your baby being really freaking happy to see you when she wakes up, even though you were really frustrated with her when she fought that nap and she knew you were but already forgot. It’s soaking in so many little moments that you know you won’t ever get back, so you treasure them.

It‘s realizing that you might miss being able to sleep in, leave to run an errand at a moments notice, have an impromptu date night, not feeling like you have to pack the entire house when you go on a weekend trip, and so much more, but you don’t miss life before this.

I don’t miss who I was before I became a mom. I would not trade any of these hard moments for the life I had before this. Not a single one.

So sure, they were right when they said it would be really freaking hard. But they forgot to mention that you make it easy.